I'm after some advice so as not to be an asshole. I have decided to quit my current band for a range of mainly personal issues and don't want to leave them in them in the lurch, but also not make things awkward. The story is I love the music these guys make, I joined them as an established band with a couple albums out and some success locally....but the work ethic and personalities just don't work for me. One guy (the main guy, its his band) is always late to rehearsals, cans rehearsals or is generally flaky. I have literally spent more time WAITING for him to get to rehearsals in the last 6 months than we have spent actually playing. we load late to gigs because he is late to meet up. we have rehearsed three times in 6 months, twice for less than an hour, I have had to paly gigs with minimal rehearsal. No writing, no arranging, no practising the show we will put on. basically a totally disrespectful and unacceptable situation for me. BUT I don't want to leave them stuck, we have one more gig in a couple weeks and that's my last one. Do I tell them I'm out now, and risk having unpleasant time from now until we part ways, or do I wait till after the gig and tell them not to book any more with me involved? I anticipate some bitchy reactions if I quit and am honest and say "its not me, its you. no respect for my time means no bass player for you", but I don't want lie and basically roll over.